Your Guide to Better Sex

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Right. The mouth. Useful for kissing and other orally administered forms of arousal (none of which should be underestimated), it’s also a tool for communication. Try it. Tell them what you want. Ask them what they like. Shoot for trust and openness.

Body image. As you notice more wrinkles or gray hair, or become aware of love handles or cellulite, you may feel less attractive to your partner. These feelings can make sex less appealing, and can cause you to become less interested in sex. Try looking at yourself in the mirror and make it a point to find a new positive about yourself each day. [6] X Research source Pauls RN. Anatomy of the clitoris and the female sexual response. Clin Anat. 2015 Apr;28(3):376-84. A lot of women are very responsive to a man’s voice during lovemaking,” Davidson says. “If a man has verbal facility and can entice a woman through his voice, that can become a powerful part of his repertoire. My own ignorance means I’ve muddled through my adult life, always slightly mystified by my own biology. Sexually, I was a late starter.Centers for disease control and prevention. Genital herpes - CDC fact sheet (detailed). 9 Jan 2017. Georgia, USA. available from: https://www.cdc.gov/std/herpes/stdfact-herpes-detailed.htm Brotto, L.A. et al. “A Brief Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Behavioral Intervention Improves Sexual Functioning Vs. Wait-List Controls in Women Treated for Gynecologic Cancer,” Gynecologic Oncology (2012) 125:320. Foreplay. Because it might take longer for you or your partner to become aroused, take more time to set the stage for romance, such as a romantic dinner or an evening of dancing. Or try connecting first by extensive touching or kissing. Kruger, T.H.C. et al. “Prolactinergic and Dopaminergic Mechanisms Underlying Sexual Arousal and Orgasm In Humans,” World Journal of Urology (2005) 23:130.

In recent years, we’ve seen a huge rise in ‘silver singles’ – divorcees in their fifties and above who find themselves out there on the single scene for the first time in decades. I thought originally it would just be swapping the gendered chapters for more on orgasm, but as I read through the book I found that I now talk differently about just about everything–mental load; communication; obligation. So I ended up rewriting pretty much the entire thing! Wait to have sex if you have advanced heart failure, severe valve disease, uncontrolled arrhythmia, unstable angina, unstable or severe heart disease.

Do Kegels

The physical transformations your body undergoes as you age also have a major influence on your sexuality. Declining hormone levels and changes in neurological and circulatory functioning may lead to sexual problems such as erectile dysfunction or vaginal pain. When and how to have sex is a personal decision. Being informed, safe, and comfortable will mean that your sexual experiences can be fun and pleasurable too.